Thursday, July 31, 2014
a forest of cosmos fronds / my own strawberries / first year for lots & lots of sunflowers - very thrilling / Miss Itsy Bitsy Betty loves the help (?) me in the garden / love cosmos, no white this year (sad face) / windowsill cat pillow with geranium / IBB posing / poppies another favourite / our sweet Bleet also in his 16th year / purple lavender potted love / a blue blue wild thing / my cat, my cat I adore him - pretty fancy office eh ? / cherry tomatoes / scarlet runner beans / Me & my girl Miss Winnie Dixon on our on morning walk / my little raised bed garden plot ... mostly flowers ;-) / lobelia / green bean blossoms & more handsome cosmos
It seems to me that almost all our sadnesses are moments of tension, which we feel as paralysis because we no longer hear our astonished emotions living. Because we are alone with the unfamiliar presence that has entered us; because everything we trust and are used to is for a moment taken away from us; because we stand in the midst of a transition where we cannot remain standing.
That is why the sadness passes: the new presence inside us, the presence that has been added, has entered our heart, has gone into its innermost chamber and is no longer even there, - is already in our bloodstream. And we don't know what it was. We could easily be made to believe that nothing happened, and yet we have changed, as a house that a guest has entered changes. We can't say who has come, perhaps we will never know, but many signs indicate that the future enters us in this way in order to be transformed in us, long before it happens.
And that is why it is so important to be solitary and attentive when one is sad: because the seemingly uneventful and motionless moment when our future steps into us is so much closer to life than that other loud and accidental point of time when it happens to us as if from outside. The quieter we are, the more patient and open we are in our sadnesses, the more deeply and serenely the new presence can enter us, and the more we can make it our own, the more it becomes our fate. Rainer Maria Rilke
love your life ... though there is much to be sad about, there is also SO much to love ...
* a sweet Buster the dog update - he's still at the vet being watched & tested f0r various potential senior abused dog ailments. He had several large growths under his chin and near where his much too tight collar was digging into his flesh. If he has something terminal-cancer he will be euthanized but if not he will soon have a foster home where he will live out the rest of his days in comfort & hopefully joy. It's obvious that he did not have much socialization with people though he is calm & gentle. He's eating, sleeping, drinking and being fussed over. I originally, in my overly emotional rescuer state, volunteered our home as a potential foster home, now that a few days have passed I realize that may not be the best solution but if they can't find a home for him he'll be coming to live with Winnie & Sam, Doug & Me & the rest of the crew.
Tuesday, July 29, 2014
finally the FINAL ;-) goodness you can tweak & fuss & add & remove & fuss some more
Those who live by the sea can hardly form a single thought of which the sea would not be part. Hermann Broch
Something completely unheard of has happened ... seriously I cannot remember a time when this has happened. I am madly in love with a piece I just created . I was asked if I would donate an art piece to a fundraising event for the nearby (Parsborro) Ship's Company Theatre - even though attending (gasp !) a live theatre event would mean leaving my much adored hermetically sealed bubble it sure doesn't mean, at all, that I 'm not thrilled to support such an fantastic regional cultural organization.
So ... on the heels of my recent Lilla Roger's Bootcamp Nautical themed illustration assignment, (after all I do live in a tiny seaside village in Nova Scotia & I can sea the ocean from my studio windows, it is exactly 139 steps to the harbours edge) ++ my fear, with this impending move (& selling of the beloved 29 Black Street) that I will somehow lose the sea ... my sea. Because I know not having easy access to the sea would damage me - I know that clear & simple. All this to say I've been on a bit of a, clinging, nautical kick (which is a really good thing) - of course a few flowers and butterflies find their way into all my creations but the sea, the sea has been my theme of late.
Turns out I love this new mixed media piece the sea, the sea so much that I know I cannot part with it - but alas and thank goodness a back-up plan is always in place and instead of donating the nautical themed piece I will donate one of my favourite botanical collages - pictured in photo 4 & 5 - framed with the help of that indispensable Prince of Every Darn Good Thing You Could Imagine - Doug.
In still moments by the sea life seems large-drawn and simple. It is there we can see into ourselves. Rolf Edberg
and photo of this piece actually framed - I am crazy about it - that never happens !! ;-)
Monday, July 28, 2014
It's Queen Anne's Lace season - oh my the incredible fields of beauty, beauty, beauty
Yesterday I was clever, so I wanted to change the world.
Today I am wise, so I am changing myself. Rumi
Yesterday, early in the morning I rescued a dog. As Winnie I walked along the boardwalk I could see a dog, a senior dog walking along the beach on the other side of the harbour. No cars & no people in sight. Instinctively you know when something about the picture your viewing is not right, the dog seemed weak & wobbly. I asked the Prince to drive me over to the other side because in some ways I am so Captain Courageous and in other ways I am the biggest Chicken you'll ever meet - I struggle near daily with these opposing factions bickering and fighting in my head. But strength in numbers, I decided + my dear Prince Doug is truly fearless.
I took a leash & food with me. The dog was walking back and forth along the waters's edge, Doug stayed back in the shadows as I approached the very scared & very weak senior dog. It took a long time before I was able to lasso my leash around him. He was wearing a collar so tight, & obviously on him so long that it had begun growing into his skin, a cheap scratchy nylon rope wrapped around the collar many times appeared to be the manner which he had been tied somewhere? Approaching a dog like this is tricky business and although I do have several merit badges of Courage (which I wear proudly) I also am very timid and cautious. I didn't want to be bitten, I admittedly was a little afraid. But ya do what ya gotta do in these situations. Gradually, gradually he and I walked back and forth up and down this long stretch of beach together, he between the water's edge and me, he always keeping himself just out of reach but finally after about 20-30 mins he gave up, he turned and looked straight at me as if to say OK - I'm tired, I'm thirsty & I want to trust you. He knew his options were limited. Bless him, seer tired old dog.
I lassoed the leash around his neck and we walked slowly up the grassy meadow like hill and he had a big, long drink of fresh water. Meanwhile the Prince went to retrieve the only person I knew of who could help me and who would take the dog - Jane Jorgenson of Paws by Wallace Bay a Saint - a kennel, grooming spot and all round animal haven place. I often refer to she and her husband Gordon as Dr. & Mrs. DoLittle. While Doug was gone Buster (or Boo) I couldn't decide which name best suited him, he & I layed in the sunshine in the grass & clover with blue sky & puffy clouds above us and it felt perfect, he even snored snoozing a bit while we waited for our rescue chariot to return I felt so happy, proud, relieved &it felt like such pure LOVE, like the only really true LOVE there is. I patted his head and stroked that place on a dog's forehead between their eye's and down their nose that they all seem to love. I spoke to him gently and told him he was safe with me. I told him I loved him - which was very true. We delivered him with Jane's help to his new, perhaps temporary home where he will experience love & affection, food & water, comfort, cuddles in ways I suspect he has never known.
The funny thing about saving one dog is that that one wonderful event cancels out at least temporarily 10-12 awful bad dog situations you're aware of but in the end you (I) feel haunted by the way that dog's life was and the knowledge that he's just one lucky guy & there are 100's, 1000's who suffer unnecessary & unspeakable cruelty. I am disgusted, furious, disillusioned & depressed by what humans do to animals. By writing this post I'm not expecting accolades, clapping, cheering ... please. I could not stop myself from doing what I did - no matter what the outcome - I had to try & help.
What I want is for everyone reading this to remember ... to not walk away from something, a situation like this one, do not say to yourself "oh well, there's nothing I can do". Instead put your BIG girl pants on (or big boy pants - for John ;-), gather a friend an ally, a partner in animal rescue crime ... and try to help/save even one animal.
As we drove to Jane's Paws by Wallace Bay sanctuary, me in the back with sweet old Boo or Buster, the look in that dogs eyes I will never forget, I felt like a freakin' super hero & that felt indescribably amazing.
Be grateful for whoever comes, because each has been sent as a guide from beyond. Rumi