4 agreements

yummy colours - Lee Jofa ad from September Elle Decor

A book it's time to reread is The Four Agreements - Don Miguel Ruiz - A Practical Guide to Personal Freedom. One of those books that should live by my bedside and be compulsory reading every few months. This week seems a perfect week to begin that practice. It's a tiny book, very easy to read, and the premise is basically if you follow these 4 rules (although I like that he chooses instead the word agreements), you will feel much more happy & free. He reveals the basic self- limiting beliefs, that most of us cart around, that rob us from joy and create needless suffering & self doubt.

In a nut shell the 4 agreements are:

1. Be impeccable with your word
Speak with integrity. Say only what you mean. Avoid using the word to speak against yourself or others. Use the power of your word in the direction of truth & love.

2. Don't take anything personally
Nothing others do is because of you. What others say and do is a projection of their own reality, their own dream. When you are immune to the opinions and actions of others, you won't be the victim of needless suffering.

3. Don't make assumptions
Find the courage to ask questions and to express what you really want. Communicate with others as clearly as you can to avoid misunderstandings, sadness & drama. With just this one agreement you can completely transform your life.

4. Always do your best
Your best is going to change from moment to moment; it will be different when you are healthy as opposed to sick. Under any circumstance, simply do your best, and you will avoid self-judgement, self abuse & regret.

No's 2 & 3 are very familiar to me, although I am much better than I used to be. In the past, I would plummet instantly into taking things personally and making assumptions, when anything disappointing happened in my life, if I didn't know the reasons why something happened, and you most often don't - I could & would make up my own horrific reasons, almost always my own fault in some way. This week, when jarred from my comfy existence by very disappointing news, I did initially sink like a rock into that place - thankfully, albeit, with some help, I bobbed back up to the surface relatively quickly and it's a much better place to be and I was reminded, once again, to try and live my life following these 4 simple agreements.