my sweet Noodle

me and my boy Jake summer 04

Jake December 1994 - January 2008

I can't remember how he ever came to have that nick name, Noodle, but it certainly seemed to suit him. He's gone, I took him to the vet yesterday morning and she agreed that it was time. His mind was still alert and his heart kind and tender, as always, but his body was giving out and he could no longer stand or get himself up.

The whole event from beginning to end was as peaceful and gentle as I could have imagined. For the previous 24 hours I'd been dragging him around from room to room on a giant bath sheet sled so that he could be with us, wherever we were, Winnie & I, which he didn't seem to mind at all. I called a kind neighbour to enlist in the job of carrying him to the car. I readied the back of my wagon with layer upon layer of folded duvets and I found his favourite big stuffed alien or spaceman. Retrievers like to carry things in their mouth, to retrieve and when they're especially happy they must have something in their mouth. So when I'd come back home from a few hours shopping in town after greeting me at the door he would always rush into the living room, nose through the assortment of stuffed toys in their toy box and always select his big purple alien. So that was in the car with him and my scarf which I wear every day, and probably should have been washed ages ago but I was glad yesterday that I hadn't washed it, that it stunk, stunk of me.


love you

The back seats were folded down and I adjusted the rear view mirror so that I could see his gentle face looking at me the whole half hour drive. Yesterday was a beautiful sunny day and his face and body were lying in a big patch of sunlight the whole trip, and I could tell that he was very relaxed and comfortable. When we got to the vets, Diane (our vet) came out to examine him and to have a conversation confirming what I already knew in my heart - that yes it was time. She gave him a small shot of sedative and said that they would come back in 10 minutes to carry him inside for the next step.

And oh what a fine 10 minutes it was. I laid in the back curled up beside him on a mattress of duvets, reminding him of some of my favourite things about him. Remembering the first night over 12 years ago that he arrived at 29 Black Street, this crazy wound for sound handsome red boy, how Emma Jane fell in love with him at first sight, how he loved to sit in laps when he was young -all 73 lbs of him. How I could drag his head up onto the pillow beside me at night and curl up into him and he wouldn't move the whole night through. He was my comfort and my security.


We lay in the back of my wagon and I rubbed his soft velvet ears and gently stroked that space between his eyes and down his snout a kind of pat he's very used to and one that he loves and I scratched his neck, all over, top to bottom and in around his ears and he raised his head and softly groaned in pleasure. It was the most perfect 10 minutes.

They finally came out and took him inside and up on an examining table wrapped up in a quilt of ours, his alien and my scarf snugged in beside him. I held his head next to mine and covered his face with too many kisses I used to tease him and say - that maybe I was giving him too many kisses, and he would always answer me back (in my voice of course) no not too many, there's never, ever too many kisses, I told him again that I loved him, just a little bit more than life itself and they gave him the second needle. And then ... then it's just over, he's gone... just like that. I stayed with him for a few minutes, asked Diane again to reassure me that it was time and that I had done the right thing. I kissed his big beautiful paws and said goodbye ... until next week when I'll go back to pick up his ashes.

We're so sad, Winnie Dixon and I ... we just can't believe he's gone.

I'm so happy that you have all gotten to know Jake, he is an exceptional dog and my absolute best friend.