sweet peas - my most favourite flower in the garden
Polaroid loveliness (if I do say so myself). These three images, all taken yesterday, during an impromptu (there's that word again) mad photography shoot using both cameras and a big patch of sunlight falling on a deep white windowsill in my guest room/photo studio.
Thank you for all the sweet & oh so flattering comments regarding my photography. They certainly were a big bright spot in my day yesterday. One of those days, all too typical for me, where I start out feeling practically invincible and very quickly begin to crumble into overwhelmed frailness - where it feels like I just can't cope with much of the life that I have. I begin to feel helpless & hopeless - a very bad combination. It's this house and yard mostly, the maintenance and upkeep of or lack there of. I honestly go outside to begin ... something ... garden gloves and bug spray on and almost instantly wish that I knew how to drive a bulldozer and had one parked in the driveway or that I wasn't very afraid of chainsaws. My yard is so large, so overgrown, and so out of control ... lush, I guess you could call it.
It's funny how negative emotions seem to breed more negative emotions. It's like that snowball rolling down a steep and snowy hill becoming larger and larger. Overwhelmed and hopeless feelings quickly join up with sadness and loneliness, which leads down that gravel road to self pity (the ugliest surely, of the negative emotions) and yet again I'm trying to buoy myself up, treading water endlessly, reaching for that same old bag of tricks (deep breathing, positive visualization, happy affirmations, tap dancing as fast as I can). I get so tired of buoying and tap dancing ... this too will pass I remind myself... and I know, unfortunately, it will be back.
Another big bright spot in my day yesterday, aside from all your lovely comments and spending tons of time with my girl Winn and all those darn Cats, was becoming completely lost in taking photos, scanning them, making slight alterations and adjustments, removing dust spots and tiny flaws. And uploading them here. Lost in this water glass with sweet peas, their stems and twining tendrils. Polaroid paintings of colour and shape and light.
Dawn is just breaking and our little harbour is completely filled with fog.
And can't get this song out of my mind by Halifax (yes that would be Halifax, Nova Scotia) Indie sensation Wintersleep
Those sweet pea photos are beautiful. After peonies and zinnias, I love sweet peas the most. Hope today is better. I know what you mean about the "lush" yard though. My overgrowth, which is overgrowing even more since our monsoon has set in, is starting to look down right threatening.
ReplyDeleteDid we all mention previously about trying to find somebody to help with the yard. Surely there must be lots of folks in a small area like that that actually have no job at all and would be pretty happy to find a yard to take care of for cash money. Or, could you perhaps even do a bit of bartering for some yard work...even baking or casseroles? .... All the small towns around this area and also where my brother the mountain man lives (in B.C.) do that all the time. They are all pretty private people..but.... when they need something...they ask around... find the guy that does that particular thing and trade or buy a bit of his experience or expertise...
ReplyDeleteRobert just built a trailer skirting for a lady and got many jars of jam for his labours.... (not that he doesn't make his own jam...cuz he does; he is very handy) ...but it works for them. He can then trade jam for something else that he needs. Right now he is fixing up an old car and will trade handyman services and/or jam for some auto parts from the local junk dealer.. (who is single and useless in the kitchen)....
I didn't realize sweet peas came in such a lovely dark color. So pretty. Our weather here tends to turn them to mush. Actually, it sort of turns Edward and me to mush, too. But, it's getting cooler,so things are looking up considerably!
ReplyDeleteGood evening, Susan. My apologies for the late stop. The anxiety I have been struggling with the last 24 hours has drive my time in a strange direction. I've been keeping myself busy so I don't have to be reminded too often that it's there. I read your blog today...always love what you write, as well as your photography. And....where do you find your music? I loved the song you posted today and last one (of the girl playing the acoustic)....love it.
ReplyDelete*hugs*
Catchy song--not heard it before!
ReplyDeleteAgain, lovely photography.