a perfectionist's lament

Sunday, June 1, 2008


a line of red tulips in my little back garden forest

Ah ! The Polaroid ... ah, the intense colour saturation ! Love it !

June 1 - time does fly, whether you're having fun or not, it seems. Kidding. Yesterday was a lovely day. Finally got La Beast Rouge out of her pen around noon and we tooled around the entire yard, she purred like a monster kitten and didn't give me any trouble at all. Merci La red beast. I don't own a whipper snipper because two noisy, loud sputtering machines would just push me over the edge - so I have hand clippers - you know the big Edward Scissorhand clippers, which I just recently took into the lawn mower repair shop to have sharpened and they now clip beautifully.

I mowed, then tidied up the curbside debris (leaves and pine needles and the odd tiny tree sprout) in front of 29 Black and then I swept the street - uh uh! That's what you do in these parts if you are a decent human being. Smile. I lovingly clipped every long blade of grass that edged the curb and around the three big trees that are in my front garden and I eventually stood back, on my neighbour Chester's lawn, to admire the new & improved meticulousity of my front garden

Oh, oh there's a long blade of grass near the driveway. Clip. Clip. Swoon.

That's one thing I have to give myself, it may take me an inordinate amount of time to actually get around to the DOing of something - but when I do - I throw myself into it with the true anal compulsion of a died in the wool perfectionist. It's why this property causes me such ongoing disconsolation - because most of this giant yard, without the proper equipment (heavy duty chainsaw, tractor, wood chipper) and the crew of 4 to operate said equipment - is impossible for me to create anything even close to perfection. And in my world if I can't make it (whatever it may be) at least close to perfect - the doing of it holds absolutely no interest to me. So ... I realize that I must just concentrate on the little patches here and there and occasional flower beds that I can make perfect. And of course I will continue my ongoing planning & scheming of ways to deal with my other back 40 - I will find that crew avec their big noisy machines.

7 comments:

  1. You crack me up! Are you a Virgo?

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  2. I just read yesterday's Pink and Red entry. What a treat to see some of your extremely cool sketches. I enjoy getting little gleanings about your journey.

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  3. I'm a Cancer Anya, and full fledge !

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  4. I'll have to read up on Cancer. I'm a Virgo, but on the cusp with Libra so I veer radically between being an anxious perfectionist and being an anxious slob. Ha Ha. Not really a total slob. I don't know much about Libra, but I think just being on the cusp dilutes my Virgoness quite a bit.

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  5. Okay. I am a libra and I tend to enjoy lazing around. But I am very industrious, too, when I get motivated. Your post made me feel slothful. But tomorrow is another day...

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  6. Oh, and ps...thanks for signing my guest book! :) You should come back and post one of your lovely pictures...one of those cute ones with you and Jake.

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  7. Hey Willow I tried to upload a photo to your guest book and it wouldn't work ?? I'll try again.

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