provide & protect

Wednesday, December 30, 2009


1 ton cast iron boiler being sawed into 200lb pieces - sighing swoon

proof ! - pas de figment of my ever rich imagination. Today we enter our 3rd month of this crazy, mad, sudden, completely out of the blue love. Just lately I've been noticing that the endless and varied declarations of love, melting swooning gazes (or plain unabashed ogling at times), and pure and simple adoration - all directed my way most often with great intensity have begun to wane. Alarms go off. Alert ! Alert ! Could this be a sign that this love itself is waning ? Always my instant, go-to thought and fixation. Insecurity rears her ugly head (again).

After a bumpy chat I am reminded that cutting up a 1 ton cast iron boiler and removing two black steed loads of scrap metal left behind by bad guys, fine tuning the heating system and cleaning out our basement so that it's empty, dry and beautiful are also all declarations of love and perhaps of the truest variety. Sheesh !! After breathing in iron dust for hours, schlepping 200lb pieces of old rusty boiler to the used steel pile the cowboy went back to his home to bathe and shave and put on clean clothes, then off to the grocery store with a list, shopping for the ingredients to make our dinner last night. So many more declarations of love ... and I'm spending time worrying where did the swooning ogling gazes go to ?

Infatuation and swooning crushing love is being replaced gradually by real big love and the cowboy is doing his very best to provide and protect for me and us and our new home and life.
And I have gotta give him lots more credit than I do. More lessons just keep on a comin'.




my handsome prince avec his cast iron filled black steed. I am crazy about him.

10 comments:

  1. Yes, and we are all crazy about him, too!!! I think you are still in that stage where you want/need to be "courted" in the truest sense of the word. While men often don't understand this, a true love will do his best to step up, and enjoy the process while he is at it!!! Just go with the flow, dear Cowboy. It will be worth it!!!

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  2. I don't know, but I think he looks pretty swoony in that pic by the truck. And as a 22-year-long married (with 3 or 4 years together before that), I know firsthand that the swoony looks come and go, but that part where they are always there for you, no matter what? Money in the bank. I like your Cowboy!

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  3. The snow in the photos just adds to it! The way life should be...
    Tail Wags to All.
    ~Moose

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  4. I saw the pictures and your long post, and I was so excited to read it! It sounds to me like the cowboy is being a REAL man. The swoony kind are temporal butterfly types. He is the type who shows love by action as well as by words and "looks." I would take that any day. It is a very romantic thing when you think about it. I LOVE him. That saw looks powerful. Hope he is watching his arms!!? A picture of you, please?

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  5. i am traveling with the captain and find myself face to face with the big real love as well, not the crush love that fades. he is a man and takes care of everything, leaving nothing to me. my lesson is to loosen the grips of control.

    much love

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  6. Thank goodness there's some light in the basement cuz it was looking a little Silence of the Lamby. (...it rubs the lotion on it's body...)

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  7. Ahhhhhh yes, the ether of new love...in another month or two, is when the ether wears off and you embark onto a new and even stronger level. The one you really start to build upon. No doubt you will still be ga ga over one another, but more like your favorite turtleneck sweater...it's when reality sets in, but you both still choose to be there and to continue to grow and build. You have so many bonuses, in that Cowboy is so talented in so many areas. He is definitely a keeper and you are one Blessed woman!

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  8. Cute! Cute! I sat here and chuckled as I looked at the photos you took and chatted about insecurities. I guess we're all learning, are we not?

    Love you much,
    xo

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  9. This last picture made me squeel with delight! He is just too-too cute, you lucky girl, you.

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  10. Your Prince and his black stallion to not only sweep you off your feet but take rubbish away! :)

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