dear December

mako shark / from Montague Street near the Foodland / tall ships & nautical everything / the view from the top of the hill - Lunenburg back harbour / seed head love / sailing art / another from Montague Street / mackerel

Your hand opens and closes, opens and closes. If it were always a fist or always stretched open, you would be paralysed. Your deepest presence is in every small contracting and expanding, the two as beautifully balanced and coordinated as birds' wings. Rumi

Life goes on ... and I think I've finally realized that I might as well go along with it.

Living this new life, in a new place, in a new home, with new people, potential new friends, acquaintances ... new scenery, discoveries, explorations + lots of new feelings & thoughts I know is medicine for me. It's really the very best thing that could have happened. I feel tremendous gratitude. I feel blessed to have this chance.

This chance to welcome the moments. This opportunity to truly embrace living in the now of my life. It's particularly jarring to me, this change in perspective because I realize how much of my life I've spent stuck in the past - sometimes the past of just yesterday or the day before that but still the past. I've been stuck also in hurt, sadness, worry, guilt - in suffering. Somehow believing that suffering was due. Why do we do that ? inflict such emotional pain on ourselves ?

Be here now. Ram Dass

I listened to a great 10 minute audio blurb from Peter Fenner (from the SoundsTrue weekly newsletter) about our attachment to suffering. Attachment to suffering - hands up if that concept resonates with you & see me waving my hand madly from the front row. In fact I've discovered in my 15 days of living in lovely Lunenburg that I begin to feel panicky if I'm not suffering (turns out, Phew ! I'm not alone). I've felt so content & comfortable here that I notice myself poking at those feelings of  ease. What's up girlfriend ? what - no angst, no sadness, no worries, no stress ? what's wrong with you ?

As we near the end of this year, as we welcome in dear December I'm getting used to this feeling of contentment, of happiness & joy. My only wish is, dear December please pass by very slowly ;-) because I want to savour every moment of you.

If your mind carries a heavy burden of past, you will experience more of the same. The past perpetuates itself through lack of presence. The quality of your consciousness at this moment is what shapes the future. Eckhart Tolle