lobster season

Bleet loves Winnie Dixon

The two of them yesterday afternoon on my still as yet unpainted studio floor. This weekend I'll get the floors painted and then begin the moving in of the proper studio/office furniture. A new to me, hand me down, giant vintage teak office desk. Sigh. from BFF Harry. Loads of drawers and a big beautiful work surface, another old plywood topped table, the kind with folding metal legs, also painted glossy black so that I'll have another big surface to spread out on if need be- read pile stuff on - ne pas ! I will not do that. My new white closet awaits becoming the centre for all things filing and printing and supplying. Soon very soon, two rooms in this big old brick house, two out of nine (and that's counting the downstairs powder room) will be finished. Dare I say those words finished. Big huge sigh.

There is some serious high speed kitten action going on as I type this. Gus & Oliver are so funny. They're thumping up and down the stairs and squealing around corners in their mad we're up, we've eaten and now it's time to burn off some of that stored kitten energy. Smile.

Today was supposed to be the first day of lobster season, here in our little village, but it's been postponed by one day because of windy conditions. This is the day that early, early outside my office window, 4:30 am or so the convoy of 8-10 boats would trail out of the harbour for the first time this year. The first day is the day they spend placing their traps so this initial first trip out their boats are precariously laden down with piles of traps and the chance for tipping in strong winds is much increased - hence for safety reasons the postponement. The traps are large wire baited boxes, that once lured inside the lobster then can't get back out of. Pretty humane - at least the capture part is. I wish I could say that I loved to eat lobster but I don't. I may have a lobster roll sometime over the summer season and really enjoy it. However, legions around these parts having been licking their lips for days, anxiously awaiting that first giant feed of lobster. Boiled 'til crimson red and plunked on a plate, bib and claw crackers in hand, melted butter to dip in near by and the requisite vat of home made potato salad and warm rolls the finishing touch. La Lobster Feed.


my big fat Nessy cat sprawled out near his dog Winn

coyote

Prairie Wolf or Coyote

Winnie and I saw a coyote yesterday at the very end of our big long walk. As far as I'm concerned a large beautiful animal ... a wild dog. But I'm afraid I'm very alone in my respect and admiration of this creature that we share territory with. This particular coyote was walking across two wide open fields in broad daylight and far too close to the homes of humans that would shoot him or her in an instant. It was upsetting, I do understand that if you live in the country you don't want your much loved cat or small dog to become dinner for a family of coyotes ... but shooting them, or even worse trapping them, is not the answer. If you kill the top predator you drastically and almost instantly screw up the balance of nature. The rodent and rabbit population booms. The more coyotes you kill the larger their litters of pups become. Don't mess with Mother Nature cause she's got the whole thing figured out ... but around here apparently it feels good to kill things that upset or trouble you (be it a hill of ants or a big beautiful coyote) and don't get me started down that track ... cause I do feel a big ol' rant coming on.

For the most part I keep these radical opinions to myself ... there's no point, I'm just wasting my breath. As we drove home I noticed that the coyote had finally crossed the road and was moving through another field, this time thankfully sheltered by a hedge row and out of view, and seemingly making his or her way back to the wooded area, far past the rolling pastures that we walk through in winter. Back to where they spend most of their time. It's only the second coyote that I've seen in over 13 years of walking out in the country and I felt honoured yesterday to see such a beautiful animal.

Coyote in Animal Medicine means wisdom & folly.

Image courtesy of American Museum of Natural History Painting by John Woodhouse Audubon.

2pm J. just left a comment reminding me of this incredible coyote blog. Please check this out !

The finches (gold & purple) outside my open office window this morning are so loud and busy, this time of the year when the windows are finally all open I feel like I live in the midst of an aviary. Such happy cheery sounding birds. Another great jewellery design project on the drawing table this week and I'm also working on an illustrated tourist map of our little village - something that they'll hand out in summer so people can find there way around. Lots of design work interspersed with floor painting and office/studio decor and organization and yard clean up ... the items on La List for this week.

java & jonquils

a new favourite mug with jonquils from my garden

MLou : Need anything from the city?
Me: Actually ... my favourite Starbuck’s coffee mug has a chip in it.

My friend MLou is also a self employed designer. She - mainly graphic design (where I began) and I'm now mainly product design. She and I became friends over 20 years ago while at art college.

We designer types, oh how we love the aesthetically pleasing, the simple, the timeless & classic. Beautiful straightforward typography. A perfect shape in smooth creamy off white ceramic, lovely to hold in both hands and in this case a mug so big that no refills are required. Merci mon ami MLou for my lovely new Starbuck’s mug (which came accompanied with a 1lb bag of the good stuff – high test Starbuck’s coffee!) Ahhh ! This morning I'm enjoying the taste of the city here in my little village, in my lovely new mug and as I sit typing while my bath of bubbles with lavender and orange pours.

We had a fantastic weekend, we accomplished a lot (in the painting realm) but the absolute best part for me was having someone here for two whole days that I could be completely myself with - no editing, no pretending, no stiff upper lip necessary - just purely who I am and oh how I needed that. What a gift, to have someone in your life that you know, without a doubt, loves you and that can handle and actually enjoys the entire package that is ... who you are. I feel like my worried and mostly sad mind has had a much needed spa vacation. Smile.

eat paint chat

I heard someone call these rays of light coming down from the clouds -the glory

It's just getting light outside, big mug of steaming hot coffee with lots of milk, typing in the glow of my laptop screen at my desk in the middle of my freshly painted office. Big happy sigh.

All the trim, the doors and the inside of the closet (soon to become the filing and creative supplies central) were painted a medium dark blah blue. My walls are a taupe brown (which I painted last summer) so it was very unattractive. For some, as yet unknown reason, the trim and closet had become daunting - one of those big monsters that I do LOVE to create out of tiny mole hills. Well maybe this wasn't a tiny mole hill.

MLou (the best friend who's sleeping in the guest room as I type this) and I had a lovely big long early morning walk seaside with Miss Winnie Dixon then home to prime les blah blue with first coat of primer. Lots of chatting and real catching up which of course makes the job of painting fly by. Lunch (chili with all the fixin's -sour cream, grated old cheddar, green onions, tomatoes, avocado, and corn chips), then back to the office for another coat of primer, tea break mid afternoon and then the final coat of glossy creamy warm white - Benjamin Moore Cloud White. Perfect ongoing, non stop, never a dull moment chit chat (we've never, ever had a problem coming up with topics of conversation) It's a hallmark of our over 20 year friendship, full on, marathon, never bored, always stimulating and interesting conversation. The best !

By the time the sun was beginning to set on our little harbour we were finally finishing up the last of the trim colour and the light was nearly gone. Time to take a stroll with Miss Winn (who'd been just hangin' patiently all day). A walk down to the park and along the water's edge, the harbour last night was as still as glass and lit by the orange and lavender streaky remnants of another beautiful sunset. Winnie loves this walk because it's a very high traffic area (as opposed to our open country walks) there appears to be a billion fascinating smells and she does tend to dilly dally, busy with her ongoing aroma investigations.

And wait ... there's more, the frosting on my big ol' delicious 3 layer cake. Back home to 29 Black Street to a dinner at my kitchen table of Chinese Food ! MLou brought with her a virtual buffet of my favourite Chinese food take out dishes and appetizers. I do lament often about the two things that I miss most about life in a tiny seaside village - going out to a movie and Chinese food. An absolutely perfect day with an absolutely perfect friend. Another big happy sigh. Time to go pour the guest a hot cup of java.

she's here !

another page from my beautiful wall calender

My Cavallini (love everything that they make) wall calender.

She's here ... still sleeping (soundly we hope) in the guest room nest. The one room in my house that I have absolutely no issues with, no big to-do list, that room, with the exception of maybe new bedding and curtains, is finished.

She arrived last night at nearly 8pm, which many of you know is practically my bed time, even on a Friday night. I am a wild thing. I made cheesy pesto tomato bruschetta to snack on and we sat in my living room beside the fire (we've been having a wee cold snap- snow on Thursday) drinking tea and catching up until after 11pm.

In a bit I'll pour her a big cup of coffee and deliver it bedside and then we'll gather up Miss Dixon and we'll all go for our big long beach and pasture hike. Then back to les studio/office for painting and chatting and tea drinking and painting and more chatting. Smile.

thank you

an embroidery pattern pour vous


Thank goodness for this blog, this place where I can come each early morning with my coffee and speak my mind with complete honesty (to vent, to celebrate, to wonder or to bare my aching heart) and where I can document, with photographs the life I sometimes can't see myself. Your comments yesterday completely turned my day around, more than just my day ... helped me to turn a big corner. I have felt that this year could be a banner year for me and my creative skills, but I do become lost sometimes in overwhelm. Thank you so much for all your support and encouragement. I'm not sure how to imbed a PDF link in this blog but email me and I will send you the PDF file of my Spring Fling embroidery pattern. I think it would be great to combine appliqué with embroidery and maybe a few seed beads and little embellishments. Aimee Ray's wonderful illustrations for embroidery my inspiration.

I have a friend with x-ray vision, who sees only good and wonderful things when she looks at me ... the friend who called me day after day when Jake's life was coming to an end so that I didn't have to cry alone, the only friend brave and kind enough to really let me share my suffocating grief & sadness, and I honestly don't know how I would have survived the beginning few months of this year without her ... AND ... she's coming for the weekend !! She'll arrive this evening (she lives in the city - the one and only in Nova Scotia). She's coming to help me with painting and getting my office/studio into shape, we'll chat and paint, drink coffee and chat, and walk at the beach with my girl Winnie Dixon and chat. And I can't wait.

Yesterday basking in the comfort and kindness of your support I cleaned and purged, preparing my office space for the big transformation (I promise to take before and after photos). I went through things, sorting and filing and carted around a big bucket of sudsy water with eucalyptus and tea tree oils. Baking soda and vinegar. I listened to CBC radio, and scrubbed and vacuumed and then later in the day I cooked a bit. A big pot of chili and a hamburger, rice, lentil stew for my girl Miss Winn.

Well it's Friday again, and like an old Italian widow who wears black for a year - Friday is the day of the week that I celebrate on this blog (because you know I'm actually celebrating 24/7) my hero dog Jake and his best gal pal Emma Jane Louise ... incredible dogs and the best friends a girl could ask for. Here they are in the ocean with their sticks - Retriever Heaven. Love ya Em & Noodle dog !

la sob story

Miss Winn & Maggy Sue at the base of the lighthouse

The sky is dark & stormy and a deep slate blue colour outside my office window. There's snow in the forecast for this evening and I think spring is on hold for a few days.

I'm in overwhelm. 90% of the time. It's a combination of things but it's mostly financial. It's like I've just become wide awake and I'm thinking to myself How did I get here ... in this place. Well, I guess I've made a few bad financial decisions, over the last few years, however those decisions were always arrived at with the smiles and blessings of my bank manager, funny how that is. I am a single income, sole proprietor of this life ... and therefore all the doing, all the paying, and all the fretting falls on my shoulders. And lately I feel totally exhausted and overwhelmed and honestly not sure who to turn to or what to do. I do hope this doesn't sound like I'm whining or complaining, I have been open & honest on this blog since day one, it is a personal journal kinda blog, and I am a heart on my sleeve kinda girl ... I'm not a good pretender and God knows I feel like I do enough pretending in my day to day life. This is the last place that I want to pretend or be in some haze of denial. Speaking about this is what's on my mind at the moment, and I'm hoping that all this thinking and processing will ultimate help.

I'm in a tricky situation and I need to figure out a solution(s). I've been speaking to a real estate agent and I now know that my home and my giant (possibly divisible lot/land) are not the Antiques Roadshow financial fantasies that I had hoped for. Les Market in this seaside village apparently is pas de hot at the moment. So ... for now scratch that idea. I received an oil bill yesterday that completely floored me - it's very cold here in the winter, you gotta have oil. Although I should have an energy audit. I know this house is terribly drafty and not at all tight. I'll add that to The List. My neighbours are offering to clean up a big broken willow tree in a far corner of my yard which initially made me feel much shame and embarrassment (although a friend assures me that I should welcome that gesture as an act of kindness). I have been (and continue to be) historically very self conscious about my inabilities to keep up with all the yard work that is required on my giant yard/lot. Sigh. Taxes are due next week and really, we won't even go there. And ... on top of everything my best friend ever, my big ol' comfort & joy in life - Jake is gone. F&ck !

So ... I have a lot on my mind and it's mostly yucky stuff. Stuff that can make you feel like you can't breath. I do suspect that I will find my way out of this ... somehow. I always do.

The sensible thing to do is to breath, deeply. Have a hot smelly bath. Go for a long walk with Miss Dixon and begin the scheming and planning of ways to build my Creative Empire. Smile ! See, no matter what, there's always a little tiny gem of hopeful optimism buried in there somewhere under all the piles of yucky stuff. But I had to write the yucky stuff to uncover that gem. Blog it seems = very therapeutic and blogging is, lucky for me ... talking to friends. Thank you !

magic

my most excellent girlfriend - Miss Winnie Dixon

Magic is what happens when you have encountered the Divine.
It is the life altering experience of connecting to the divinity
that dwells within yourself and in the world.

Phyllis Curott

p 167 Romancing the Ordinary - A Year of Simple Splendor

Silent and still at 29 Black Street this morning except for the sounds of birds.

gifts from the mountains

bits of lovely colourful & very thoughtful things

I received a package yesterday at the post office, a beautifully decorated box which had the girls at the counter oohing & aahing (and I do love to cause a buzz at the post office, be it a new hair cut or tres exciting mail). A new found blogging friend Anya, someone who visits this blog regularly and comments often, sent me a package of goodies.

Inside a lovely note and photographs of her beloved dogs all of whom have gone to dog heaven. She too had a soul mate dog named Jake that she's mentioned often in her comments. Her comments during my Jake's decline and death and those awful days soon after were always comforting, words I needed and wanted to hear, over and over. Tears on tissue paper, tears of feeling touched by such an act of random kindness and giving and tears of sadness remembering that so many others also have a big ache in their hearts from missing and longing for, their own best friends.

Lots of goodies spilled out of a box lovingly decorated with flowers and birds and interesting postage stamps. Embroidery floss and sweet tiny felted wool balls which Oliver & Gussie felt sure were for them. Those darn kittens insisted on helping me open the parcel, making tunnels and caves in crumpled bright tissue. Also a package of lovely smelly stuff for my bath, piles of beautiful patterned tissue paper to add to my collection, a CD of favourite girls music and a book by Sarah Ban Breathnach - Romancing the Ordinary. Right up my alley, it's a book absolutely chock full of simple pleasures. Thank you Anya !

My big fat black cat Bleet has just joined me up on my desk and I must pause here for some mad hard patting and rubbing and in return I'll get loads of loud purrs and sweet kitten kisses.

collection no.1

an assortment of treasures we've gathered on our walks

Deep breath in. Admittedly sigh-ish exhale out. Another Monday, and I've discovered lately, not always my best day. The beginning of a new week, another big list of things that need and should be done, many others that I'd like and want to do. As the temperatures warm up and spring fully arrives that list now includes many outside things as well as inside things. And I don't mean extra long walks in the afternoon at low tide with my best girlfriend Winnie Dixon. Sigh again. I dream of the day when my life and everything in it feels manageable ... when it becomes small and compact, tidy and all mine. Now it feels way too big, overwhelming most of the time and out of control. It's too much for me.

But ... for right now I can only put one foot in front of the other. I mustn't get bogged down in overwhelm. I have a friend who's helping me, she can see the real me, she even sees parts that I've lost track of, she can see the me thats buried under all of this. She has x-ray vision. And she's helping to dig me out. And I love her for that.

For now deep breaths, yoga and hot bubbles are the only cures I know.




my photography assistant, sweet Oliver

the big rock

Winnie in her spot on The Big Rock

Our walk each morning, now that the ice is gone, consists of a stroll down a dead end road, a walk down the cottage lane, through the field to the lighthouse, down the red clay cliff to The First Beach, where we stroll along and collect beach glass, shells and worn shards of floral pottery and smooth round pebbles of wood. Then we round a rocky point, another pebbled beach, a stretch of big rocks we climb over especially if the tide is full and we arrive at The Back Shore.

At The Back Shore there is a giant washed up log for us to sit on and the grassy lane, which runs down between the pasture and the small woods (where the Blue heron's nest in summer) ends here, just up from the log which sits at the top of a sandy beach which is perfect for swimming in summer.

Then we round another rocky point, this one leads out to sea to form a crescent reef that is exposed at low tide and a popular haunt for the fat seals to sun themselves. And this rocky point sits at the bottom of more red clay cliffs that lead up to The Bayberry & Wild Rose Pasture, a favourite overgrown field that wet dogs (especially my Noodle dog) love to roll in after a morning swim. We often climb the cliff in summer so that we can stand at the top scrunching leaves of bayberry between our fingers and holding the crushed leaves up to our nose, smelling that wonderful smell of summer and we stand in the overgrown pasture looking out over two beaches and a reef, big rolling pastures, the small woods and our most heavenly place.

Then onto the final beach which we call The Back Back Shore, when the tide is low sand bars stretch out far into the straight and are dotted with shallow tide pools which in summer are filled with tiny hermit crabs. This beach is another that is perfect for beach combing, we're always on the look out for tiny jewels of beach glass or beautiful smooth striped rocks. Our final destination sits at the end of this beach, just before another very rocky section of shoreline. We always stop and sit for awhile at The Big Rock. After we've sat awhile, often just Winn & I, we head back, we retrace our route and our footsteps all the way back to the car. And that's our morning walk.






yesterday as we sat on our rock the sky was beautiful

lemon love

lemons

I love lemons and lemon things like some people love chocolate and chocolate things - I prefer lemon (I like chocolate too but lemon would come first in a contest). I came across this recipe for Blueberry Lemon Yogurt Loaf at Smitten Kitchen and whipped one up Thursday afternoon ... my goof off, do whatever you feel like afternoon. It turned out beautifully and would also be great with no lemon at all, just more vanilla, a dense moist loaf to serve thick slices of with fresh strawberries and whipped cream ... sigh, strawberry season another month or so away.


la loaf

Two changes that I made to the recipe. I didn't have vegetable oil so I used melted butter and I only had 1 cup of blueberries (frozen) left over from last years blueberry season. I live smack in the middle of blueberry land and sometimes known as the official Blueberry Capital of the World. So putting up blueberries (freezer bags full, jam, preserves or canning) is just something you do every year around here.

Painting & taxes my only two projects for the weekend. Must get myself in a big ol' groove and attempt to stay there. Smile & sigh.

Don't you love when the sky moves fast enough that you can see it moving. As I look out my big window this morning there's a giant bank of dark grey clouds gradually but visibly overtaking what was a clear blue new morning sky. The birds are all singing madly and I think we're in for more rain.

3 dog days

my best friend, my everything boy... for over 12 years

My God what a face. This is one of the gazillion photos I have of my hero dog Jake. And this is the one that gets me the most, that makes my knees feel weak, gives me a catch in my throat and makes my eyes tear up ...always. It was taken on his last Sunday weekend big walk with the girls and Maggy Sue and Channy (another golden retriever and black lab). I remember that day so clearly, he was his usual big ol' goofy self, barking at the girls in his senior dog gravely bark voice, demanding some attention or better still a cookie please. Full of beans (and wieners) I always told him.

Oh how I love that dog ... and I miss him so much. Sleep tight Noodle dog.
I love ya ... just a little bit more than life itself.

Yesterday was sunny and very warm, the temperatures rising to +19. And breezy, warm breezy the best kind. Clothes flapped on the line. I worked at my desk through the morning finishing up a little project and after lunch I decided to goof off. To do absolutely whatever I wanted to do. It was just too nice to be stuck at my desk and with rain fall in the forecast for Friday (today) it seemed the most sensible thing to do.

I did a little tidying, a little baking, then lots of raking and clearing, crunchy brown leaves that smelled of childhood. Me & my navy blue wheelbarrow and my favourite well worn leather garden gloves. Gently uncovering bright green and new poking up into sunlight and warmth. Finally a long walk with Miss Dixon at low tide. She and I walked way out on the sand flats beside sparkling blue water, peering into tide pools always on the look out for some magical find and finally we lay down on our backs in the golden dry grass, she and I, at the bottom of the grassy lane, the sun beating down on us, and nothing but blue, blue sky above us and we stayed there, just like that ... for a very long time.

And a photo from my unforgettable 3 dog days.


Emma Jane Louise, Winnie Dixon & Jake

a still life

still life

The sky outside my office window is deep turquoise, the window is open and the gentle breeze blowing in is fresh with a slight chill. The birds are awake and beginning their morning chatter and song, the crows busily zooming around the yard and we hear seagulls (always) in the distance. No radio this morning. When I stand with my coffee in this big open window all I hear is stillness and birds. I have always loved this time of day, it's why I love to get up early. To see and hear another day gradually begin again, new, never the same and always full of endless possibilities, hope and promise.



You can search throughout the entire universe
for someone who is more deserving
of your love and affection than you are yourself,
and that person is not to be found anywhere.
You yourself, as much as anybody in the entire universe
deserve your love and affection.

Buddha


current desk top

stormy

Monday morning's walk on the beach

It's a yoga morning and I'm behind schedule ... a hot bubble bath awaits with lavender & eucalyptus. Yesterday that gang of motley characters wreaking havoc in my head seemed long gone. It was a perfect, gentle, sunny blue sky day. On our early morning walk we came across a bald eagle sitting on the beach, as close as I've ever been to such a majestic creature. Eagle in Animal Medicine is the biggest and best totem meaning Healing, Spirit & Creativity. I sat at my desk all day content and very much in the moment working away and accomplishing much. Miss Dixon and I had another lazy afternoon walk in sunshine and we sat on a rock for awhile gazing out at a sparkling sea and listening to the gentle lapping of waves and we felt SO grateful for the lovely life that we already have.

Here's a quote that I came across yesterday that I plan to make into an illustration - a small poster print for my Etsy shop.

we are shaped by our thoughts.
we become what we think.
when the mind is pure -
joy follows like a shadow that never leaves.

Buddha 563 bc - 483 bc

right on Buddha !


Tuesday afternoon's walk at the beach

spring gear

Bleet & Miss Winnie Dixon ready for rain

Big deep sigh. Followed by as many deep breaths as possible and maybe then a few yoga poses. Yesterday was just one of those days when I could not seem to get out of my head and my head was taking me on a high speed, twisting and turning, doom and gloom, all is hopeless you fool - kinda ride. Yuck !

For those of you reading Eckhart. It felt like one of those early spring days when those guys all get their muffler less, big tired, jacked up in the back, Trans Ams and Cameros out of storage. My Ego and My Pain Body sat in the front seat and I felt trapped in the back seat with the latest hanger on in the group - my most favourite role to play - The Victim. Poor me. Whoa is me, it's so hard, I'm all alone, I have to handle everything by myself. And I'm obviously doing a tres shitty job. Oh Whoa IS me ! We squealed around all day with the top down Guns & Roses and Motley Crue a blazing. It was horriblé !

All that is required to become free of the ego is to be aware of it, since awareness and ego are incompatible. Awareness is the power that is concealed within the present moment - NOW !

Page 78 The New Earth - Eckhart Tolle

That sentence initially may come across as very deep, maybe mystical sounding, but if you really think about it - IT actually is all so simple, and so straightforward. And It requires continuous ongoing practice. I need to prepare myself for the many slips ahead and many high speed rides where I find myself clinging onto past ways, for dear life. But I have become aware ... ever so subtly at times but it is still awareness. Oh Phew !

And here I sit this morning, coffee in hand, sweet little Buddha cat Oliver purring beside me. I did survive another day. They decided I was boring I guess and they packed up and left sometime during the night. I know they'll be back and often I don't hear them coming. They surprise me and I'll suddenly find myself thick in IT, before I realize it's them. It feels like I don't know how to make them leave, or maybe I just decide to sit down, have a drink and join them. Hey, this is just like old times. Party ! One more big sigh.

My new 24" imac arrived by courier yesterday. The giant cardboard box now sits in my kitchen - a large trophy to my procrastinating persona. What's the point of unpacking it until it has it's new perfect surface to sit on in it's newly painted office ? Which of course is not ready. Who's going to get that done if it's not you girlfriend. Blah ! Blah ! Blah ! Sigh. Sorry, that Victim Girl just pushed me out of my chair and typed those last few sentences. I made her go away ... and I closed my office door. Sigh.

So a silly, happy, colourful illustration from the archives this morning (and J. I have not forgotten about the request for jewellery drawings). Miss Winnie and her kitten Bleet dressed up in silly rain gear, in spring gear ... now if I can just get myself into spring gear. Smile.

5 things

gerberas blooming in my sunny office window

5 little things that make me smile

purring
avocados
Miss Winnie Dixon - what would I do without my best girlfriend
morning coffee in darkness & quiet
bubbles with lavender & orange

what little things make you smile ?

six word memoir

contentedly exploring my own little world

I've been tagged by Willow Manor

1. Write your own six-word memoir.

2. Post it on your blog (and include a visual illustration if you’d like).

3. Link to the person who tagged you in your post.

4. Tag five more blogs with links.

5. Remember to leave a comment on the tagged blogs with an invitation to play.

and now I'm tagging 5 others:

Pherenike at Sunshine Dew
J at Fucked Up Chick
Patti at Live to Lounge
Paula at A Mingling of Threads
Austen at Stripey Pebble

Phew ! I gotta say I found this tag challenging (in a good way), hard enough to come up with 6 words to sum up your life but then far worse, (especially for we ex-graphic designer types) coming up with an image that expresses or builds on those sentiments, but of course in an ever so subtle and not-so-literal way. Choosing the image ended up being the much bigger struggle ... but fun. I'm changing the rules slightly ... I think that the tagging of 5 others should be or could be optional. I know it can seem imposing tagging people ... so I'll leave it up to my tag-ees to choose whether they want to continue the tag game.

My little harbour is filled with thick fog this morning, grey and heavy and if it weren't for the cool breeze blowing in my slightly open window, listening to the sounds of the birds and their singing I would think it was summer.

Miss Dixon is snoring in her bed under my desk, and we're just about to get bundled up for a long morning walk along foggy shores.

funny little thing

Félix Vallotton - another from the museum postcard collection

A funny thing happened yesterday. I had been for my almost daily after lunch stroll to get the mail. I walk to the end of my street (a few steps as my house is only the second house in from the end) a left turn and a short walk up what is one of two small main streets in this little village. I stopped in to visit my friend Harry (as I often do) at his little Home Décor & Gift shop (which opens for the season May 1st). He and I gab a bit and catch up with the last few days of news from each other. He's just finishing up a total reno of his kitchen and yesterday I spoke for the first time with a real estate agent, beginning the conversation about selling my house (that's an entire other story yet to come). We often will walk up to the post office together to pick up our respective mail. I received only fliers yesterday, totally shattering for me, as I am a magazine/mail pig. I can't get through the magazines I just received yet still, all I want is more, more .... it's a bit of an addiction and it began years ago with Seventeen Magazine.

So Harry and I chat and gab and walk back to his shop have a great a weekend & stop by for coffee, why don't you and I carry on the very short distance back to my house. As I'm standing on my front porch just about to go inside, a car drives by really slowly with the window rolled down. My first thoughts are maybe they'd like to buy my house and then more realistically maybe he's going to ask for directions. But no, he says are you Susan ? I initially do not recognize the face. Oh Oh! think quick, whats my pseudonym ? says the hermit girl who shares my head, dang can't think quick enough ... I say yes ? He parks the car, leaves it idling, leaps out from behind the wheel, takes his glasses off and rushes across the street to meet me saying do you know who I am ? Me you look really familiar. He said his name Robert W. Oh of course ! Big Hug ! Someone I knew very well through both elementary and high school. He's now beginning to go bald, his hair is grey, he's wearing glasses, and he's dressed like a Dad. God I wonder what I look like after all these years ? eek.

Apparently he'd been having lunch in the Cafe across from the post-office and he spied Harry and I and said to the person he was traveling with I know her and he said he'd stalked me, slowly, in his car back to my front porch. We hugged in the middle of the street, had a 3 minute blast of a catch up conversation, he was here for a meeting somewhere. Married? Kids ? Dogs? Cats? Work? He apologized that he was running late for his meeting but said he was so glad that he followed me to ask who I was. He turned and before he got into the car said you were always very high up on my list of favourite people. I smiled back and said and you always made me laugh more than anyone. Which was so true, he was the clown in school, racy, kind of bad (compared to me and my good girl persona) and always, always hilarious.

funny how it's often the little things that can really make your day.

hero

another self portrait polaroid of me and my hero dog Jake

I have managed to creep out of the deep pit of sadness I plunged into after the death of my amazing hero dog Jake. That desperate kind of sadness that makes you want to be somewhere else, anywhere else, up floating on a cloud or tucked away in the nest of down and flannel ... no people, no responsibilities, just endlessly lost somewhere with him.

Tears are streaming down my face as I type this, but they're no longer desperate tears, they're tears of love, of longing for him, and of memories and gratefulness. I am so lucky that he found me, that he ended up here at 29 Black Street and that he lived his long and always exuberant life by my side.

I love that dog so much. I'm in absolute awe of how big that love is and I hope I always will be. I love you Noodle.

girlfriend

best girlfriend Winnie, ice and the lighthouse at low tide

Raccoons on the roof last night and my ego and my pain body (for those of you Eckharting) have been restless, demanding and loud and they partied hard in my head most of the night. Sigh.

I watched Oprah (taped earlier in the afternoon) last night. All about A New Earth and how it was affecting a handful of people from around the world. It was very interesting, encouraging and did help to cement further the idea that thinking ... almost always, gets you into trouble (definitely applies in my head) and thinking or thoughts are not real. OMG Phew ! That's such a relief.

It's a practice to show your ego and your pain body the door and sometimes, this week for example, I've felt weaker than usual and I have let them both have their way with me. Stop and breath or better still take some time to be in nature, both sure cures for a chattering mind and lucky me I have the most heavenly place to go when I want to get lost in the moment ... walking at the beach almost always works.

So ... after a slight melt down yesterday afternoon I said to my girlfriend Miss Winnie Dixon, let's get in the car and go. Yesterday was a glorious sunshiny spring day and the ice on the beach by the afternoon was almost all gone. We walked for a bit and then Winn and I sat for awhile on a big rock on the beach ... and we just sat, she and I, just hangin' at the beach. And sure enough I felt much better.

lulu

La Queen of Maison Le Noire

Otherwise and unfortunately known as Squacamolé (read squawk). Lulu yells ... she's always yelled. She opens her mouth as wide as can be and a meow (?) comes out that is loud, demanding and just a tad grating. She is now nearly 17 and going strong ... I am very happy that it's looking like she will enjoy another summer roaming around outside. She has an old white wicker chair on the front porch with a pillow covered in a beautiful vintage pillow case, and that's where she holds court. She'll get off her throne here and there throughout the day to wander around our large overgrown yard and garden or sometimes to give one of the stray Tom cats what for if they dare to enter into her queendom and if she happens to hear me puttering in the kitchen she will leap to the windowsill so that she can yell at me from the other side of the screened window. She doesn't seem to want or need anything, she just insists on reminding me constantly of her existence. If I go outside and pick her up and sit in her chair with her she snuggles in and burrows her head into my arms and purrs. She wants my attention and she wants it all the time. And perhaps she's just reminding me to stop, come and just be in her moment .... if only she didn't have so many moments.

I hear song birds outside my office window and it's still pitch black outside at 5:15am. Smile.

our early morning

Winnie and I decided to take you with us on our early morning walk