Saturday, January 31, 2009

the DA - the design associate

Oliver again. My design associate ... most excellent confidante, executive assistant, my comfort, my joy, and miniature red golden retriever (in disguise). I kid not, he hangs atop the teak topped desk all day, every day, just in case I might need his help. Which of course I often do. He and I are currently working on a tres challenging design project, a little removed from my normal cute comfort zone. I've heaped enormous expectations on the outcome of this project and after two full days I've seen only tiny glimmers of these expectations actually being realized - which causes the feeling of extreme panic - 'cause ya know this could be the project (and you know we've been waiting expectantly for this axe to fall), that the tried and true creative process here at 29 Black Street might finally fail miserably. Sigh. Customer No Uno (her wish is my command) called yesterday and threw a wee cute project into the fray of tres taxing. So ... Oliver and I will be here at the teak topped desk all weekend with the exception of two long walks, Miss D and I, with our friends Deb & Maggy Sue at the golf course. Hooray !

The perfect second fat mug of coffee is here by my side, a concoction of cocoa butter, shea butter, vanilla & almond bubbles are bubbling - a creamy comfort bath this early morning. A big ol' sad front moved in this week from completely out of nowhere (or so it seemed at first). I've been cruising along in neutral for quite some time. You know that kind of sadness that wraps itself tightly around those so big they should never ever be asked questions like What's the point of all this ? and What's my life all about anyway ? way too much thinking and not enough breathing. It strikes me funny that what we used to call denial, it seems we now call living in the moment. I'm tired of winter and coldness, I'm tired period. I feel lazy and sluggish, I can't wait for darkness to fall so I can allow myself to retreat to the nest - which most evenings is around 7pm (in my defense I do wake up at 4:30 - do the math s'il vous plait). My team of invincible, mute valets decided to continue their Bingo bus tour down into Maine and as a result no one at all is tidying this house. Sigh again. I've made an appointment with my Dr. because I do believe that much of this blah-ness is likely (hopefully) hormonal or the depletion there of. This morning I will go to our little pharmacy and buy Vitamin D supplements and I've promised myself that today I will also begin, reducing my sugah intake, I do so love ma sugah. I will take my fish oil Omega 3, 6, 9 ... and so on ... supplements and see if I can't turn this ship around. Yet again.

Many thanks for all the great book recommendations. I do think it sounds like we have very similar tastes in books - a few suggestions I have read and loved - Mark Haddon & Wally Lamb - and many other titles I've made note of. Here are four more novels currently on order from the library and two new non-fiction books checked out this week and currently sitting bedside. I'm thinking I might re-read Garp as my next fiction project. It's been over 20 years and I do remember absolutely loving that book ...

The Hour I First Believed - Wally Lamb
The Piano Teacher
- Janice Lee
The White Tiger - Aravind Adiga
The Story of Edgar Sawtelle - David Wroblews)
I had this one from the library a few months ago but was afraid to read it ...

Driving Over Lemons: an Optimist in Spain - Chris Stewart
Climbing the Mango Trees: A Memoir - Madhur Jaffrey


  1. After viewing your precious feline...I could almost be persuaded to want a cat. Course my King of the House (Fritz-my schnauzer) may not like that too much. ;-)

  2. I spy a beautiful, flossy retriever as desktop wallpaper of a snazzy Mac.

  3. I've been afraid to read Edgar Sawtelle, too! I am supposed to though, for our neighborhood book club! I swear, if there's anything sad about a dog in it..I'm throwing it out the window. I have never read Garp! But, I did love A Prayer for Owen Meany. That was wonderful.

    Happy Saturday, Susan!

  4. It's inspiring just to know there's another person working her way alone through a weekend of creative projects, holding doubt at bay. I can't wait to read the new Wally Lamb novel too.

  5. the nest calls me too about 7 p.m. because i'm also an early riser...
    but not quite as early as you.
    Hang in there.. these winter months can be so hard.

  6. Oliver is so beautiful it brings tears to my eyes.... and...
    he is so helpful too. Look how gets right "into" helping you file.... what a guy.....

    hope you have some major flashes of brilliance on the design front over the weekend...

    I am tidying... cuz all the bingo bozos around here went south too..

  7. Susan,
    Your Oliver is an emotive clear-eyed honey! Thank you for the book recommendations that you left at Oasis. I also go through periods of fiction only then nonfiction. I'm reading more nonfiction now but I like the kind of fiction that mixes with the author's real life biography. I hope you get your feeling of vitality back. It's hard to see the beauty around when we feel out of it.

  8. Your pics of Oliver are so adorable! Cozy! I wishing you a brighter night and day tomorrow. Thinking of you (even if I miss stopping by a day or two). I have your artwork hanging on my wall at work and folks are always commenting on how much they like it. =)


  9. What great long whiskers Oliver has! Beautiful photos of a great cat.

  10. Oh gosh, i love cats. i so want to kiss Olivers sweet head.

    "The perfect second fat mug of coffee is here by my side, a concoction of cocoa butter, shea butter, vanilla & almond bubbles are bubbling - a creamy comfort bath this early morning."

  11. I love your journal.
    Great pictures and postings

  12. "what we used to call denial it seems we now call living in the moment". That's just plain profound, Susan. Well, I like it fairly well, this new concept. It means we can practice denial with out guilt.

    I loved Driving Over Lemons. Before I actually lived in a foreign country for two years, I read dozens of books written by expats in various locales. I loved those books...I vicariously enjoyed the expat life in so many wonderful countries through reading those books.

  13. more book talk -- loving it! i read edgar sawtelle this fall and it was good. i just finished the hour i first believed and i like it but not nearly as much as his first two books which i loved.

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